Thursday, April 29, 2010

Ursh vs the Rats of NIMH! (Now In Our House)

So anyone who knows us knows we’ve been having a squatter problem in our cottage. The squatters being small, furry and liable to steal food if given half the chance! No, we’ve not been invaded by a herd of rogue hobbits, what was here where….RATS!!

We’re out in the more agricultural area of Benoni. This is grand for a bit of piece and quiet and really nice if you have a habit of feeding the neighbours horses carrots when no ones looking, but the down side is we also get a lot of vermin in our small little cottage.

Recently it’s been rats that’ve come through the ceiling and then couldn’t get out again when the ceiling was closed up. Now imagine sharing your home with a bunch of beasts that are out to nibble on everything, destroy your stuff and keep you awake at night! (Parents of small kids may be excused!)



So it was with a heavy heart that we decided to poison the varmints. Believe it or not that was our last option! First we tried finding humane cages to catch and release the buggers, both of us not particularly keen on brutal deaths by poison, but no matter where we went, pet shops, hypermarkets, supply stores and hardware shops, no one had any.

Then we thought of traps, like maybe a quick break to the neck wouldn’t be so bad. (I’m not exactly sure how breaking your neck isn’t so bad but let’s leave that detail for now).
But the trap we got wouldn’t spring, it was stuck tight and a sumo wrestler could have launched his whole magnificent body onto it without fear of a single fat roll. In the end I guess that was okay as the rats wouldn’t eat the bait anyway. Picky bastards.

But they did eat the rat poison and a few days later, the smell started.

Now you know that smell. It’s not a smell you can mix up with say boiled tripe, poop or even your mad uncle Henry. It’s that smell, the death smell. (I’ve read authors describe it as ‘sickly sweet’. Sickly hell yes, but where the heck did they get sweet from???)

So brave Ursh decided to dive in and find and remove all ‘rat that is on the non living side of life’. She donned one of my pink shirts about her face, liberally sprayed with my deodorant, incase the smell was worse closer up and, clutching broom and dust pan like a trouper, went in to see what she could see.
And did she see!



We’d managed to get two of the vermin passed on to cheese heaven! Luckily they were in an easy area to get to and we had them up and out the cottage in no time! I’d like to say we stood there, like twin Rambo’s in the sunset, glistening with sweat as we surveyed our handy work with pride, but mostly we were just dry heaving and trying not to puke! How the hell does something so small pong so badly?

We now have a cat to help us take care of the last one who is proving too smart for poison. Mind you our kitten is such a passivist I wouldn’t be surprised to come home and find her with each arm around a rat, swaying too and fro singing, “Give peace a chance!” >_<



Well at least that’s 2/3rds of the problem taken care off! We’re humans, we use tools, we wear clothes (really cool clothes) and we are intelligent! We’ll get that last rat you just wait and see!!

^_^


[[[This is a King Rat. It's what happens when many rats are in a confined space. Their tails get entwined and start to knot and grow, yes grow, together. A Rat King can live for a while if there is food but most die pretty quickly. I'm showing this pic because we DIDN'T find one of these while cleaning! And when you look at it that way, really why complain?]]]

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