Jovvi's Bus Ride!

The Gautrain station is known for its, well trains, kinda obvious really, but did you know they have a bus service as well? I wondered what it would be like to take one of their nifty looking buses? I haven't been on a bus in ages!! What do you suppose it would be like? Well, here's a bit of a nibble for you to find out as Jovvi does her first Gautrain bus ride!!!

The buses are kept inside the train station parking lot. A rather creepy, dismal place that has a dark and ominous feeling to it. Hey, what would happen if there was a power failure and all the lights went out? It was with a little trepidation that I set foot inside and began to scan the rows of buses for the chariot that would take me to heaven on earth, namely home and a soft bed!

Here it is!! Doesn't it look lovely?! Quite a posh little bus! But oh, 12 minutes until it leaves the station! Let's explore around a bit! For those who'd like to know, the bus station did not smell of dank and mildew and bodies long forgotten as I sort of hoped it would.

Yip this is definitely our bus! Either that or the suburb of Randburg has gotten really small lately! This is the second pic I took! The first one had the flash on and succeeded in blinding me so much that for a moment I couldn't see hair nor hide of anything and may well have wandered into the road and been mercilessly flattened! Except of course that I just stood still and the glare eventually went away! Hence why this is called Jovvi's Bus Ride and not Jovvi's Trip to The Morgue!

I think movie blokes could do an awesome chase scene down  and around these pillars! Bad guys shooting, people swearing, kids screaming and dodging between buses! It could be just like the average South African political get together!

When we entered the maw of the bus I received a nasty shock! I was told the ride is R12, which it was, IF, ah the catch, IF you'd already caught the Gautrain in the last hour. If not then it shot up to R20! Day light robbery and I wasn't even in the daylight!

Inside the bus! It was pretty empty so a choice of seats were mine for the taking! And one of these fine looking, if rather narrow and uncomfortable, seats ended up with my end up on it! The sign you see above the bus assured us that the next stop was Sandton! Brilliant! Well it would have been only we had just come from Sandton! :P

I sat opposite the seat they'd stashed the fire extinguisher under. I happily regaled stories of bursting extinguishers and tanks and what would happen to the person on the chair if it ever did go KER-BLEWY!!!! 

I then suddenly had the urge to move to another seat.

Ok the pics not great, but this shadowy hulk would be the train station. I snapped the pic as we whizzed past. Granted you can't see much of it, but aren't those clouds something?

Here we are stuck in traffic! Now it's not so fun being stuck in traffic, lordy don't we know it, but it is kinda nice if you know YOU aren't the one driving, or the one who has to pay attention. Drive forward my good man and pedestrians? Let god sort em out!! 

What is there to do on a bus? Well I:

looked out the window, 

speculated about the people on the bus, 

speculated about the people not on the bus, 

remembered previous bus rides, 

compared it to the ride I had in a truck once, 

complimented them on having nice low straps that us short people could hold onto if we had to, 

worried about the price of  petrol, 

wondered what exactly the difference between petrol and diesel is?

dissed people who used diesel,

favoured my listeners with tales of my childhood not at all related to buses,

mentioned I was hungry,

watched a lady demand to get off the bus before the stop and asked her silently if she'd like us to get her laundry at the same time?

and wondered if I could get away with dancing naked on the golf course to New Age twinkly music... 

And all the time that "Next Station: Sandton" sign flicked reassuringly above our heads.

The thing - Emmie dam - Feb 2012

Here indeed we have a mystery! This odd thing at Emmarentia dam! Whatever can it be?

But it was my birthday and the gods of curiosity had decided a closer investigation was in order because the fence (protecting?) it, that is usually locked up tighter then a vestal virgin, was wide open! So who were we to turn down a divine quest? We decided to go in and have a look, all up close and personal. Don't you think it looks like someone's homage to a giant silkworm?
Let's check inside!!

Hmmmn, ok. Broken brick work and a fence which won't be making it on the list of 7 Wonders of the World this year. This all looks like a prop from an X-files episode, that had been abandoned and forgotten. But there was something interesting in it!

Me!!!  ^_^

So it's not a great sunshade. It's not pretty, it's locked behind a fence most of the time, it doesn't have a view and it's soul job seems to be putting shade onto half a fence and making you think, What the Heck?!?!

Eat your heart out Roswell!! 

The UK Emporium - Feb 2012

When ya gotta have Dr Pepper, to put a spring in your stepper, who you gonna call?
The UK Emporium!!

Or you could just drive there like we did!
Let's go see what all the fuss is about!
Eeeek! Hard left Rob, hard left!!!!

Here we are! Contact info for those who need it!
What awaits inside?

A ton of goodies that's what!! Mostly munchies but all sorts of interesting things, drum roll maestro, we have:

Aero chocolate, orange flavour! Oh my word!

Kitkat in orange and, of all things mint? Ye crazy Brits! Okay look, I don't eat chocolate but there was still a thrill involved!

A slab o' toffee so powerful it comes with a hammer to eat it with! I wonder what the kids do with the hammer afterwards? "Hey Johnny, I got a hammer and nails, wanna play stigmata with me?"
"No way Susie, that will make dad cross!"

 Tooth paste! Because local just doesn't cut it? Don't you think the packaging makes it look like something out of the 1800's? Like one of those snake oil items, "Cleans your teeth, cures boils and will put hair on your chest - women only!!"

Never been to Scotland but wanna pretend you have? Buy souvenir key-chains right here in Africa! Your friends will never know your life is a magical fantasy of trips never taken and unicorns never ridden!

Attractive word that.. clotted...

Our Sandra should know better ducks!

Buy American paraphernalia you can only get in England!

Oh my heart was happy! A can o mushy peas!!! Nothing is authentically Brit without a side order of mushy peas!! ^_^

Love this! A great poster to have in the UK maybe but here in SA your 'taters came from far, far away! Foreign veggies, I tell you Herbert, what is this world coming to?

Hmmn, tough decision, when buying sausage you have to ask yourself, do I want it full of blood (Black P) or without? How do we choose?

And in the end what did I get? A nice Union Jack wallet! It's wonderful! Has an awesome coin side and if I'm ever attacked I can open it and use the super silver inside to blind my assailant! Really so many uses!

Ironically I forgot to take a pic of all robs Cherry cola's and Dr Peppers! The main reason we went!
But should you be hell-bound to see such things, hop on in the back of the car next time and we'll show you this little world within our world!

Impromptu ROAD TRIP! (28 Jan 2012)

On a Clear and sunny Saturday Rob and I decided to take a road trip!!

Okay that's not entirely true. Originally we planned to go on a hike at a farm, but we got lost and decided, bugger it, let's just keep on going!! Below find the tales of our wanderings!!

Off we go along the open road, mile and miles of green trees, grass and open skies! It was just awesome to see! This is a Jovvi view from the left hand passanger seat!

Admittedly trees, grass and sky made up rather a large chunk of our first leg of the journey. We were in another provence all together, the North West. And it's here we clocked up over 200km's of driving!!
It was entertaining though! I spent most of my time hanging about the window trying to get shots that weren't green and brown blurs!

Oh! Here is Hartebeesport dam! It looks deceptively easy to get to, but there are so many lodges and private reserves and such around it that finding your way to it's shores is not really an option! I don't think that's fair! It's lovely, it should be shared with everyone. Or at least just me!

 There's a lot to do in Magaliesburg! The signs pointed us to horse riding and camping grounds, candle making factories and... oh wait! What's this....

CHEESE FARM!!!
When I saw the sign I knew that was were we were going! Rob was amicable so off we went! I'm not sure why I had this sudden need to be there since I don't even like cheese, but my nose was blocked so I figured I was pretty safe!

We speculated about the cheese farm. Did they grow cheeses in rows? Or were the cheese free range and organic? Did they eat hay? How hard was it to breed a good cheese?

 Yes, yes, we're COMING!!!!

I preferred our ideas on where cheese should come from!

The cheese farm is pretty large and has tons of cyclists who come to cycle the tracks then have lunch at the resturant, cheese and cycling, a natural combo! Here is one of their goats they had having a good scratch! So that's what nature gave em horns for! Don't you wish you had a pair for those really deep itches?

We met a few other colourful characters at the farm as well. There were even sheep, with a little baby we named Shaun. Sadly he was rather camera shy. (Though once we'd walked away and turned back there was the little bugger, up against the fence and looking smug!)

Our next stop was for Rob! We halted at a little side of the road place that unashamedly advertised as having the worlds best biltong! (American's: that's Beef Jerky to you.)
Rob ordered some, reached his hand into the brown paper bag, took a slow, savouring chomp.... and proclaimed it, if not the worlds best, at least up there in the top 5!

 Every Bob and his dog seemed to have an Art Gallery around here! And the pics were not exactly going cheap either! Funny enough they all have the same look to them, like one person mass produced them and then sprinkled them about the country side with reckless abandonment!

With chilli, fruit and herb plants it's no wonder the bathroom are right there!

Isn't this pretty? We stopped all over taking photos of interesting things! Well I took photos, Rob was my wingman!

There were many interesting things to photograph, some really pretty!

And some just silly....

Our car paked at yet another scenic place to take pics of! Sometimes it was like we were the only humans left alive. Knowing my luck all the others would be zombies coming up just round that curve...

Back in the car we went and headed off to more familiar grounds!

Like Lifestyle garden centre in Randburg! Oh my word! Oh my word! Oh my word! Look at this little thing! It's a Tenrec! Isn't it so cute?! I so want one!
At R 2000 a pop though, sadly that is more just a really nice pipe dream.

WANT ONE!!!

Technically Lifestyle is a large garden place with a ton of interesting things from hobby supplies to ghastly tacky ornamentation to plants by the colourful bushel!
So of course we only paid attention to the critters!

 Our next stop was Vegieland in Sunward park, Brakpan. Veggie munchers to the left, all the rest of you to the right!!
Sadly the shop was not up to expectations but no worries, we'll just find somewhere else twice as nice!!

Then off to Builder Warehourse in in Kempton park!
 It's a big hardware store.
A BIG hardware store!!
Gosh I get tingles going into one of these!!! So much potential down every isle!!!
Sadly were were there just to get rob a plank of shelving, which takes hardly a few minutes.

It should take a few minutes but it took for frikkin' ever! And then the heavens opened with a god almighty downpour! Here we see [unnamed] guardsman, lowering the outside garage door a bit to stop the rain getting in. As you can see he was not entirely sucessful.

Since cutting one plank of wood appeared to be a science of great time and dedication akin only to growing a clone, I went off and sniffed about the hardware store.

Aren't these samples of wood lovely? From silver pine, to cherry, to deepest black! Mind they're all chipboard just with fancy paint on them but the overall effect gets an A+!

Since the tree that would supply the wood for Robs plank seemed to still need to grow I then went over to the tile section.
This is my favourite section! *Bounces*
Nothing says non-pervy sensual pleasure like feeling up different types of tiles! The glass sort are my favourite but pebbles come a close second!!

Finally we ended the day going to Greenstone mall and the food lovers market behind it! (Take that Vegieland!!)

I used to think the grass here was real and was mightily impressed at the greenstone gardening department. Then, alas, I found out it's fake astro turf. Now every time I see it I remember how sneaky this place can be!
Rob gave in some second hand books and bought a spindle of CD's and then we both went and got tasty food items for supper!

Oh supper! How I want you!!!

It was past 6pm when we got home! 9.5 hours on the road, and over 300km's driven!!!!
And best off?  100% Worth it!
THAT is how you spend a Saturday in my view!! Talk about entertaining!!

And now excuse me, I need to spend all of Sunday SLEEPING, I'M SO TIRED!!!!

The EXPERIENCE!!!

So Rob bought this ginormous Ferrero Rocher Chocolate that's just been daring him to purchase it for the last month or so! Can you imagine such a big ball full of chocolate? We couldn't wait to unwrap it and see what it was all about! How shiny golden the wrapper, how warm and heavy the ball. Such hopes and dreams were never brought forth as they were with this benign little package.

 Rob removed the cover slowly and delicately, this was not a processed to be rushed!! The crowd (namely me) watched breathlessly! A plastic shell was revealed under which beat a heart of solid, lustrous chocolate!! Look at the size of that thing!! And all those little bits sprinkled about in it's creamy skin? Why those would be cheeky pieces of hazelnut there to only enhance the majesty of this confection! Isn't it magnificent? If you'd like to take a moment of silent worship, you may!

But OH NO!!! What is this?!?! How can it be?!?!
Rob cut the bonbon ball in half only to find out.... IT WAS HOLLOW!!!
Weep! Weep with me little ones! Such cruel false promises!!! A consumer was mislead into thinking they'd get more value for money than they did, who has heard of such a thing?!
Oh Ferrero Rocher, we trusted you!!!!

 Well any way such is life, want a piece?