Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Vaguely moist

Frak.
Frakkitey Frak Frak Frak!!
It's raining again!

Look I've nothing against rain, it's really quiet lovely, and it waters all the plants and makes pretty flowers and looks like silver diamonds falling from the sky onto a world wrapped in a gray cloth of mystery etc etc.
But come on already!

It's been raining continuously (with just small interruptions here and there to get my hopes up and then break them brutally) for the past heading on 3 weeks! It's like god put it up as his South African screen saver and then forgot to turn the monitor off!



I know our country often needs rain, we're famous for our droughts, step right up, best in the southern hemisphere! But see, I live in Johannesburg. We have tar roads. And sky scrapers. And too many jerks in jeeps who think it makes them look cool but really just helps you pick out who the jerks in jeeps are.
We don't need excess rain! It just makes pot holes, bumper bashings and Kelly next door's hair frizz!

A light sprinkling ever now and then? Sure thing!
A thunderstorm to make us appreciate nature and how we've over come and subjugated most of it? Okay sure, why not?
But this continuous down-pouring? Heck no!

Send it out to the Free State or Natal ... or... damn I can never remember all the provinces! Once it got past 4 I just stopped bothering.

But send the rain out to where it's wanted. Where there is corn waiting in need of water. Where there are grapes and watermelon and all those good things I want to eat! Send the rain to them, they'd be happy to have it. (Only not too much, because it's the little people, aka me, who suffer when crops get ruined!)

My poor walk shoes. They're disintegrating from all the rain. And I can't go getting a second pair because they'll end up copy catting the first pair! My feet have long forgotten what it means to be dry. Evolution is webbing my toes as we speak! And my umbrella is beginning to resemble a crushed, mutant spider. I didn't know prongs could bend that way?

I think I also just miss the sun. Sure it burns me and beats me into submission with excess heat and UV rays, but there is something very uplifting about a clear blue sky.

Well I guess there's not much I can do but accept it? Oooooooooh!!! Bring back sunny skies! All is forgiven!!!

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